One of our themes for our 2017 Spiritual Workout was Forgiveness. Pastor Doug Boquist, the Senior Pastor of Lima Community Church, sat down with Andy Lynch to talk about this important subject.
What Forgiveness is not
If you still feel bad about a situation, it doesn’t mean you haven’t forgiven someone. Likewise, if you still feel sad, or occasionally even angry, for what happened it doesn’t mean you’re harboring unforgiveness. Whether or not you’ve forgiven someone is separate from the emotions you feel about the wrong.
What Forgiveness is
The key component of forgiveness is whether you feel like you could bless that person. If you’ve surrendered your right to take revenge, you’ve forgiven them. Forgiving the person who wronged you leads to a sense of freedom, and many times we think we haven’t forgiven a person when in reality we have. We beat ourselves up for our feelings.
It doesn’t mean we have to return to the same kind of relationship we had prior to the wrong. It doesn’t mean you have to put yourself in harm’s way again. To forgive a person simply means you can bless them.
If you find yourself seeking to be forgiven, and the other party won’t, that’s not on you. We need to understand that you are not on the hook for their actions.
Romans 12:18 says,
“If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”
You can’t control what someone else is going to do: you can only control your own heart.
Make it a lifestyle
Unforgiveness is like cancer, and if not addressed will affect other relationships. When we understand how much we’ve been forgiven, that helps us to better understand the importance of forgiving others. Learning to forgive can be a progress. We need to understand how we’re progressing, mending relationships over and over again.
We have to want to want to forgive, breaking free of the prison of unforgiveness!
5 things we get by serving others
Jesus instructs us to lead through servant leadership. When we obey His commands there are things that we get out of it. Learn what those are in our free guide.Download our guide here